Hold Up

Ronin

1998 was quite a year, we got Celebrity Deathmatch, learned that Sonny Bono couldn’t ski, and we received John Frankenheimer’s spy thriller/car-chase extravaganza, Ronin. Ronin is the story of a patchwork group of specialized espionage agents who are tasked with stealing a briefcase from a group of well-armed somebodies. This flick stars an ensemble cast featuring Robert DeNiro, Jean Reno, Sean Bean, and some other familiar faces that can really deliver on screen. A modest success, Ronin brought in a scritch over $70 million on a $55 million budget and mostly positive reviews but, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate whether this one has fulfilled its honour or should have committed seppuku.

Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels

In 1998 Guy Ritchie wrote and directed his first feature film in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. LS&2SB stars Jason Statham in his first acting role, Sting (kinda), and many other faces who would later star in Guy Ritchie’s follow-up, Snatch. LS&2SB is a comedy crime story which focuses around a group of friends who lose their stake in a high stakes poker game and now owe big money to a big time criminal/porn kingpin. They need to find a pile of money fast and you’ll need to bring a compass and a notepad to follow along as this flick takes a lot of turns with a lot of characters.  LS&2SB was made for a budget of $1.35 million and brought in a staggering $28 million return and a lot of fanfare and critical accolades. But, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate confusing plots and the sweet release of getting beat to death with a dildo as we try to figure out if this one is the nuts or an all-out bluff. 

Stand By Me

In ’96 Rob Reiner released Stand by Me a movie based on a Stephen King novel about four boys who go looking for a body and end up with something more, lyme disease. Okay, maybe not lyme disease but they definitely learn something about themselves during their journey. Stand by Me stars Wil Wheaton, River Phoenix, Corey Feldman, Jerry O’Connell, Kiefer Sutherland, John Cusack, Richard Dreyfuss, and a dead kid. Stand by Me was a box office success, received well critically, and remains a big part of a generation’s youth, but does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss dead kids and sick balls as we figure out if this one is worth the adventure or if we should let it rot by the creek.

Glory

In 1989 Edward Zwick directed the American war drama “Glory” about one of the first black infantry regiments following the abolishment of slavery. It’s a tale that starts out with Robert Gould Shaw (based on his letters) but soon focuses on the brave black men who risked everything to join up and fight the South. It was nominated for 5 Academy Awards and showcases an amazing performance from a young Denzel Washington. It also stars Matthew Broderick, Morgan Freeman, Cary Elwes, and Andre Braugher. It was praised for it’s writing, directing, cinematography, score and editing…but does it hold up? Listen as Jon, Colin and Brent discuss the finer points of this period war drama to see if it carries the flag with pride, or if this piece of history should be forgotten in the past.

American History X

In 1998 Tony Kaye’s powerful directorial debut American History X was released. The film stars Edward Norton, Edward Furlong, Beverly D’Angelo, and a few other known faces in supporting roles. American History X features the story of two brothers, Derek and Danny, who are deeply ingrained in a neo-Nazi organization. Derek, played by Norton, is newly released from prison for manslaughter after killing some would-be car thieves, and Danny is a student still living in his shadow and is tasked with writing an essay on his brothers’ incarceration. Derek has since become enlightened and aims to take his family in a new direction away from the hatred and small-mindedness of the racist gang. What follows is a complicated exploration of his history and his first day out trying to undo the harm of his racist past and heal his family. American History X was released to much critical acclaim and scored Norton an Oscar nomination for Best Actor. But, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss brainwashing and huge assholes as we decide if this one stands the test of time, or if it has lost its way.

Army of Darkness

In 1993 Sam Raimi released the last in the Evil Dead trilogy with Army of Darkness. This time Ash is teleported to the middle ages and must retrieve the Necronomicon in order to save a couple of kingdoms from the evil that has plagued them and return him to his time. Army of Darkness stars the incomparable Bruce Campbell and no one else you’d recognize. It won the 1994 Saturn Award for Best Horror film, made $21 million from an $11 million budget, features a score by the awesome Danny Elfman, and maintains a huge cult following. But, does it hold up? Listen is as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate the evil and the dead and do our best to figure out which this is.

Titanic

In 1997, James Cameron released Titanic, a movie whose name describes the level of patience you need to sit through a 3-hour movie about a slowly sinking boat. Titanic features some big names in Leo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, Billy Zane, and the Kathy Bates. Leo and Kate play Jack and Rose, a pair of unlikely lovers who capture each other's attention despite being from opposite sides of the tracks, or floors of the boat, as it were. Kate is engaged to a huge douche and despises the constraints of high society. Leo is a charismatic street kid who flies through life by the seat of his pants. Also, there is a boat and *spoiler alert* it sinks. Titanic was made for $200 million and brought in an absolutely stunning $2.194 billion in the box office and made a bunch of people sit in ice water in their tubs. But, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss unchecked power and listening to granny’s fuck stories as we decide if this one sinks or swims.

Platoon

The ‘80s were pretty much a grey smudge on history. Blown out hair, keyboard guitars, and cocaine binges ravaged the cultural landscape and led to more than a few weird experiments. Despite all of that, and probably thanks to cocaine, we got Oliver Stone’s Platoon in 1986. Platoon is the story of Charlie Sheen and his two dads in Vietnam. Willem Dafoe and Tom Berenger star as the two dads, his squad and platoon leaders, and polar opposites of the moral compass, and Sheen must decide to either keep his humanity or lose it to endure hell. Or maybe that’s just me. Platoon made a whopping $138 million from a $6 million budget and received critical acclaim and recently was selected for preservation in the Library of Congress’s National Film Registry. But does it hold up? (feels like a weird question after all that, right?) Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate if feeling good is good enough as we decide whether this one holds up or gets overrun.

The 'Burbs

In 1989 Joe Dante brought us a rare moment in cinema that captured a bit of suspense, a smidge of horror, and a pile of comedy in The Burbs. Starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Corey Feldman, and Carrie Fisher, this movie brought a lot of star power into Dante’s sometimes capable hands. When their elderly neighbour, Walter, goes missing, three neighbours suspect foul play from their odd, ghoulish, neighbours, the Klopeks. What follows is a string of wild attempts by the inept would-be detectives as they try to catch the Klopeks red-handed. The Burbs made a meagre $49 million from an $18 million budget and was not overly well received by the critics. But does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate giving up on life and annoying neighbours as we try to decide if we should save the neighbourhood for Cory Feldman’s entertainment, or if they should have just left this one buried in the backyard with the ‘80s.

Se7en

Today we look at David Fincher’s critically acclaimed and creepy as fuck 1995 thriller, Seven. This crime-thriller stars Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow, and an unbilled Keyser Soze…I mean Kevin Spacey…was included as John Doe. Seven is the story of a serial killer who is selecting targets and punishing them due to their guilt for each of the seven deadly sins while two detectives race to catch him. John Doe effectively makes himself an agent for God’s criminal justice system and a real buzzkill for free spirits and hippies alike. Made for $33 million, Seven brought home an astounding $327 million in the box office and scarred a generation of people. But does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss Schrodinger’s cat and what’s in the box as they try to see if this one holds up, or should be brutally tortured and dismembered in the good lord’s name.