Hold Up

The French Connection

In 1971, the world was introduced to a different kind of Popeye, one that likes killing cops and robbers more than eating spinach, in William Friedkin's The French Connection. Starring Gene Hackman Fernando Rey, and Roy Scheider, La Connexion Française tells the story of two New York Cops, Popeye and Cloudy, who will do whatever it takes to find, follow, and kill bad guys. And these upstanding law enforcers don't let minor challenges like entrapment, police brutality, racism, and lack of evidence get in their way. No, these men are real NY cops, so they'll follow you for days because you look like a [racist expletive deleted], or barge into a bar for [racist expletive deleted] and lock patrons in phone booths until they get the info they need. Oh, and there's a guy from Marseille (that's in France dummy, thus the name of the movie) who wants to sell $36M of heroin and decides the best way to do it is through a young couple who aren't really connected. Made for $1.8M, TFC pulled in $75M worldwide and was nominated for 8 Academy Awards and won 5. But does it hold up? Listen as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss the origins of buddy cop movie cliches, if it is a good idea to end a movie in the middle of a climax, and how much driving and walking to destinations is appropriate for a 104-minute movie as we see if this flick is c'est bon, or shittier than a racist, back shooting, cop killing, asshole named Popeye.

Fearless (1993)

In 1993 a strange thing happened—a dirty and unkempt Jeff Bridges or “The Dude” wandered out of a smoking cornfield with a baby and towing a small boy behind him. Confused? That’s because it’s the opening of the Peter Weir directed movie FEARLESS. Bridges plays Max Klein, a man who survives a plane crash and starts to believe he’s invincible. He ponders if he’s dead or a ghost and occasional walks into traffic, takes walks on skyscraper ledges and does some highly questionable things behind the wheel of his 92 Volvo . Naturally his wife Laura (Isabella Rossellini) is upset and confused by his erratic behaviour and makes it all about her. Not cool. Max also finds friendship in Carla, (Rosie Perez) another survivor who lost her baby, affectionately known as Bubble, in the plane crash. Together. Max and Carla try to figure out how to cope with survival guilt and buying Christmas Presents for the dead in hopes they can get back to the land of the living. The movie gets a 85% on Rotten Tomatoes and Jeff Bridges considers it to one of the favourite films in which he’s appeared…but does it Hold Up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss if by the end Jeff Bridges gets out alive OR did the plane crash opening mark this flick as dead on arrival?

Kill Bill Vol. 1

In 2003 Tarantino brought us his two-part revenge story, Kill Bill, and this review is for Vol. 1. Kill Bill is about a scorned lover who is trying to work her way through various levels in her attempt to reach the final boss, the titled Bill. Uma Thurman stars alongside Lucy Liu, Michael Madsen, Daryl Hannah, Vivica A. Fox, and David Carradine in this thrill kill ride that was Tarantino’s long-awaited follow-up to the excellent Jackie Brown. Does it hold up? Will the bride kill Bill? Will it be a thrill? Will I take this pill? Will Bill kill the Bill killer before the Bill killer can kill Bill? Does he prefer William? Some of these questions might be answered as we figure out if this flick is a killer or should be killed.

Porky’s

Bob Clark of Black Christmas fame surprised everyone with his 1981 silly sexy comedy, Porky’s. What’s Porky’s about you ask? Surely it’s about a clever pig who is a single mother, fighting for survival in a brutal factory farming hellscape. Nope, high school kids trying to get laid but in the attempt, they find themselves in a war with a local pimp, Porky. Porky’s became an instant classic and long held the title of top-grossing Canadian film, as if size matters... But, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate pork, pimps and penises and all the things this flick shows as we try to figure out if Porky’s pops our cherry or our hopes.

Whoops - Episode Missing

In 2023, the Hold Up team ran into technical issues, and what was supposed to be an amazing Kill Bill Vol. 1 Episode turned into a bad explanation of why this episode isn't here. A corrupted file, coupled with unavailability due to vacation, means that we have to wait two weeks to fix the first half of Quentin Tarantino's revenge classic. But does it hold up? Well, you'll need to wait to see if it does, have you not listened to our show before? Until then, listen in on this short explanation as Jon apologizes and tries to make light of a shitty situation and see if our audience is won over by our honesty or if this trio of podcasters can eat a dick for not getting it right the first time and making everyone wait.

Erin Brockovich

The people scored a win at the dawn of the new millennium when Steven Soderbergh and Julia Roberts took down a chemical giant in the true story retelling of Erin Brockovich. This story brings Roberts' into the title role as a single mother with no real job prospects fighting to make a life for herself and her kids when she fights her way into a position with a law office and stumbles upon a case that will change everyone’s lives. This flick became an instant classic, bringing big profits at the box office and getting nominated for multiple awards. But does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate corporate greed and sexy lawyers as we determine if the hold-up court rules in favour or against Erin Brockovich.

Working Girl

In 1988 Mike Nichols directed Working Girl and likely caused much of the hole in the ozone doing the hair for it. Working Girl is a movie about a girl who works but wants to work harder so she assumes her bosses role making deals and banging her boyfriend when the bass breaks her leg skiing and is unable to return home for several weeks. But, when the boss returns and accuses her of stealing her own idea, things take a turn for the worse. Will she finish the deal? Does she get to keep the boyfriend? Will she learn to act? This flick stars massive hair, Harrison Ford, Melanie Griffith, too much eye makeup, Joan Cusack and Sigourney Weaver and was even nominated for five Oscars, and won one. But, does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss '80s hairstyles and how much coke you'd have to do to not notice them as we try to figure out if this flick is working, girl. 

G.I. Jane

Today we start our celebration of leading ladies and our takedown of the patriarchy with one of our favourite badasses, GI Jane! Ridley Scott brought this crowning achievement of Demi Moore’s career to us in 1997 which co-stars Viggo Mortensen and Anne Bancroft. GI Jane asks; should women be allowed in all areas of the military? For the debate we see Moore brought into the most extreme military training in the US, SEAL training (technically CRT training but who knows wtf that is?). Does she have what it takes? Will she kick a seal in the dick? Does it hold up? Stick around as Jon, Colin, and Brent debate self pity and men’s fear of tampons as we try to see if this one stands up or rings out. 

Can’t Buy Me Love

Happy New Year! Today we have a movie and the official motto for incels with 1987’s, Can’t Buy Me Love. This flick stars Patrick Dempsey and Amanda Peterson and tells the story of a loser who pays the head cheerleader to hang out with him for a month so he can go from “totally geek, to totally chic…” It works, and he bangs all her friends, but things go downhill when her college bf turns up and finds out she’s been whoring. This flick was one of the most memorable teen romances from the 80s and it features New Year's Eve, so it’s here… but does it hold up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent, debate negotiating sex pricing and the best way to collect wet dog poop in a paper bag as we try to figure out if this one holds up or if they shit on our house.

Four Christmases

In 2008 Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon figured they would get into the Christmas movie game with “Four Christmases.” With a script that couldn’t be changed due to the writer strike—director Seth Gordon assembled an all-star, award-winning cast including Robert Duvall, Jon Voight, Sissy Spacek, Mary Steenburgen, Jon Favreau and, of course, Dwight Yoakam and Tim McGraw. The story follows Brad and Kate, a couple of yuppies living their best lives and heading out for a tropical Christmas vacation. But when the flight is cancelled, and they are exposed to their families for lying about their plans, they now must make amends and visit all four of their divorced parents in one day. It’s not long before we realize why Brad and Kate lie every year to avoid their families, as they have been trying to keep their awful childhoods under wraps. This leads to some crazy slapstick and over-the-top hijinks… but does it Hold Up? Listen in as Jon, Colin, and Brent discuss this Christmas movie to see if it is one we want to stream every December, or if it has out-lived its welcome and deserves to be on Santa’s bad list.